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Excuse-mongering pro-abort columnist wants it not both ways but all ways

by | Jun 16, 2020

By Dave Andrusko

Editor’s note. With Father’s Day on the horizon, we’ve been running new and reposted columns about men and abortion and/or men and fatherhood. This particular column, which ran a year ago, speaks volumes about how some men keep their part in an abortion “an unexplored secret” at the same time they continue to reject any responsibility for the decision that ended the child’s life.

 I suppose it is possible that there are women and men who are so removed from the reality of what happens when “choice” is exercised that (at least on the surface) they are oblivious to the gravity of what they have done to someone whose only “crime” is to follow the laws of prenatal development. Everyone else’s opinion, I suspect, is a mixture of regret, self-delusion, self-exculpation, and rationalization on steroids.

Mark Brown is a columnist for the Chicago Sun-Times. I know nothing about him other than that he decided to write a column that ran under this headline: “A personal story of abortion, from a man: It’s a memory I normally keep pushed way back in the recesses of my mind, but I need to talk about this now.”

Why is he writing about an abortion that happened many years ago to a woman with whom he has long since lost contact? Why would talking about this column be the second time he had discussed the abortion with his wife?

The cover story is

Because it’s weighing on my mind more than ever these days with abortion so much in the news, as some states move to criminalize it, while Illinois pushes back in the opposite direction — both sides anticipating a potential Supreme Court reversal of Roe v. Wade

Who knows, maybe so. Much more likely, the next sentence is the real reason.

Also because I keep thinking that, for every woman who has an abortion, there was a man somewhere in the equation, his part an unexplored secret.

Brown travels hither and yon, repeatedly offering up the all-purpose reminder that he’s not telling anyone what to do. Why would he, after all, “I’m pro-choice. My experience definitely informs my position. I believe a woman has the right to make her own decision on whether to bring a child into this world. It’s her body.”

But he wants people to know he was affected. The baby? What baby? The girlfriend? What girlfriend? They “lost touch.”

Brown wants it not both ways but every way. Pro-choicer to the bone but appreciative that this “long-ago abortion was probably one of the pivotal events of my life, as it must have been for millions of other men and that’s something that ought to be acknowledged aloud [then the caveat] without detracting from the idea that abortion is a matter in which a woman’s views should take precedent.”

He even expresses gratitude that his one-time girlfriend didn’t tell him until after the abortion she’d been pregnant—that “she made the difficult decision entirely on her own.” 

Why? 

Because if she’d had their baby and maybe even they got married, it would have “changed the course of my life. Profoundly, I’m sure. And not for the better.”

Etc., etc. etc.

At some level, Brown knows he behaved terribly. “For me, there would always be a sense I had let her down. There was shame or guilt as well, not that I’d done something immoral but that I’d messed up her life.” But, not to worry.

It’s not my place to tell a woman what she can do with her body. But surely there must be room for me to speak out against others who would do so.

And, at least for me, being honest about my own experience with abortion is an important step in that direction.

So Brown announces to the world his cowardly gratitude that he never had to act like a responsible adult. And, by publishing it in a newspaper, to his children, by the way. 

But in so doing, we are to believe it is a kind of brave protest against anyone who speaks out against abortion.

Prince of a fellow.

Brown speculates what reason[s] the woman had to abort. Judging by the column, perhaps the most accurate one is she’d concluded, “I wasn’t ready to be a father or, at least, wasn’t the right prospective mate.”

Categories: Abortion
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